BetaArchive Logo
Navigation Home Screenshots Image Uploader Server Info FTP Servers Wiki Forum RSS Feed Rules Please Donate
UP: 6d, 9h, 36m | CPU: 33% | MEM: 2050MB of 3617MB used
{The community for beta collectors}

Forum rules


Any off topic discussions should go in this forum. Post count is not increased by posting here.
FTP Access status is required to post in this forum. Find out how to get it


Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 14 posts ] 
Author Message
 PostPost subject: Never lie to your Mother.        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 1:59 pm 
Reply with quote
A young man called John invited his mother for dinner,
during the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how
beautiful John's flatmate, Sharon , was.
She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two,
and this only made her more curious.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to
wonder if there was more between John and his flat mate than met the eye.
Reading his mum's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking,
but I assure you, Sharon & I are just flat mates".
About a week later, Sharon came to John saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner,
I've been unable to find the frying pan, you don't suppose she took it do you?"
"Well I doubt it, but I'll e-mail her just to be sure" said John. So he sat down and wrote:

DEAR MOTHER,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID" TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID NOT" TAKE THE FRYING PAN BUT THE FACT REMAINS
THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER.
LOVE JOHN

Several days later, John received an email from his mother which read:
DEAR SON,
I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO" SLEEP WITH SHARON , AND I'M NOT SAYING THAT
YOU "DO NOT" SLEEP WITH SHARON , BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF SHE
WAS SLEEPING IN HER OWN BED, SHE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE FRYING PAN BY NOW.
LOVE MUM
NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER!!!!!


Top
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 2:08 pm 
Reply with quote
Staff
Offline

Joined
Sat Oct 14, 2006 12:05 am

Posts
786
ahaha! Thats great! :D


Top  Profile
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 2:14 pm 
Reply with quote
Staff
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Wed Apr 11, 2007 2:11 pm

Posts
2607

Location
Germany, Earth

Favourite OS
Windows 10
aaaaah lmfao (Y)

this is a useful post

_________________
MS vNext: Windows 10 ESD Database - Windows 10 Build Labs - Windows 10 Update Archive - Office 2016 Version Tracker - Office Downloader


Top  Profile  WWW
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 3:17 pm 
Reply with quote
Donator
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Thu Mar 15, 2007 5:11 pm

Posts
338

Location
West Sussex, United Kindom
Thats good (Y)

_________________
|3e|\|

Image
Image
The Number One HTTP Server On The Internet


Top  Profile
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 4:04 pm 
Reply with quote
Donator
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Thu Aug 31, 2006 2:45 pm

Posts
1432

Location
UK

Favourite OS
Longhorn 4074
rotfl :lol:

[offtopic]It's good to see you back, KenOath :) [/offtopic]


Top  Profile  WWW
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 4:41 pm 
Reply with quote
Donator
Offline

Joined
Sat Feb 24, 2007 4:14 pm

Posts
6612

Location
United Kingdom

Favourite OS
Server 2012 R2
lol, thats brilliant (Y)

_________________
BuildFeed - the ultimate collaborative NT build list - Windows Longhorn - a look at a defining Microsoft project


Top  Profile  WWW
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 5:50 pm 
Reply with quote
Donator
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Mon Sep 04, 2006 1:06 pm

Posts
1004

Location
USA
Great! Funniest thing I've read in a while!

_________________
Old-Computer
BetaArchive VIP | Ex-OSBA Member


Top  Profile
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:07 pm 
Reply with quote
Donator
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Tue Jun 19, 2007 5:55 pm

Posts
549

Location
UK

Favourite OS
Windows NT 4.0
I just came back and ROFL :D :D :D

_________________
My Website -
Ecclesia Semper Reformanda Est


Top  Profile  WWW
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 4:17 pm 
Reply with quote
FTP Access
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Mon Sep 04, 2006 1:45 pm

Posts
732

Location
Norway

Favourite OS
HP keystroke RPL
Am I the only one thinking his mom's a bitch trying to stop him from tappin that?
She was probably hot and his mom totally hid his frying pan.

_________________
Let's sperg about hardware
E6410 - i5-560m, 8GB, WXGA+, NVS 3100M, Samsung SSD 830 128GB, WWAN, 9-cell, E-Port Plus Replicator
Desktop - i5-2500k (4.3 GHz TB), 8 GB, HD6950 2GB, 2x24" 1080p, Samsung SSD 830 128GB + 2 TB stripe, Xonar D2X


Top  Profile  WWW
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2007 11:41 pm 
Reply with quote
Donator
Online

Joined
Fri Dec 29, 2006 6:40 am

Posts
1513
lmao


Top  Profile
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Sat Nov 17, 2007 4:26 am 
Reply with quote
FTP Access
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Sun Aug 27, 2006 11:03 am

Posts
386

Location
Australia

Favourite OS
Windows 7 Ultimate
rofl, genius.
I'll have to note that, it may come in handy some day :P


Top  Profile
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Sat Nov 17, 2007 4:49 am 
Reply with quote
FTP Access
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Mon Sep 04, 2006 1:45 pm

Posts
732

Location
Norway

Favourite OS
HP keystroke RPL
merty wrote:
may come in handy some day :P

Right.

_________________
Let's sperg about hardware
E6410 - i5-560m, 8GB, WXGA+, NVS 3100M, Samsung SSD 830 128GB, WWAN, 9-cell, E-Port Plus Replicator
Desktop - i5-2500k (4.3 GHz TB), 8 GB, HD6950 2GB, 2x24" 1080p, Samsung SSD 830 128GB + 2 TB stripe, Xonar D2X


Top  Profile  WWW
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 5:34 am 
Reply with quote
Another one similar to the 1st post....

"Going Fishing"

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go
fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his friends.
We'll be gone for a week.
This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting,
so could you please pack enough clothes for a week and set out my rod
and fishing box? We're leaving from the office & I will swing by the house
to pick my things up" "Oh! Please pack my new blue silk pyjamas."

The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy but being the good wife she is, did
exactly what her husband asked.
The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking
good. The wife welcomed him home and asked if he caught many fish?

He said, "Yes! Lots of Salmon, some Bluegill, and a few Swordfish, But
why didn't you pack my new blue silk pyjamas like I asked you to do?"

The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box!


Top
 PostPost subject:        Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2007 7:38 am 
Reply with quote
Donator
User avatar
Offline

Joined
Thu Mar 15, 2007 5:11 pm

Posts
338

Location
West Sussex, United Kindom
That's brilliant :D

_________________
|3e|\|

Image
Image
The Number One HTTP Server On The Internet


Top  Profile
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 14 posts ] 




Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Jump to:  

All views expressed in these forums are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the BetaArchive site owner.

Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group

Copyright © 2006-2018

 

Sitemap | XML | RSS